Day 238: Phillip’s Amazing Stretchy Pants

Phillip’s Amazing Stretchy Pants
Matt Zurbo


Phillip was a likeable kid,
with a likeable smile,
who got a pair of stretchy pants
that really cramped his style.
(Tartan stretchy pants.)

“Try them on anyway,”
his grandma politely asked.
“Okay, Nan,” he said,
with a grimace that he masked.

But the pants weren’t just stretchy,
they were incredibly so!
Not once did they rip,
when he pulled them to and fro!
(Kid, having thrown leg of pants over rafter, hanging upside down, other pants leg caught in door, stretching, not ripping.)

To build his new tree house,
all Phillip had to do,
was use his stretchy pockets,
to carry all his tools.

The timber and the ladder
also fit in there.
As far as stretchy pants went,
they were an amazing pair!

With room for all the birds,
that could not fit into nests,
Phillip used his stretchy pants,
as a hammock when he needed rest.
(Pants stretched as hammock in tree house, pockets full of birds/nests.)

Bully Bob saw Phillip’s tree house,
declaring; “Grrr! I want that!”
And set about invading,
by squashing Phillip flat.

Phillip tried to run away,
but his pants got caught,
slinging him back through the air,
which Bob thought real good sport!

Bully Bob’s laughter fading,
no knowing where he’d land,
Phillip began to panic,
regretting trusting Nan.

The pants then puffed out,
and not a moment too soon,
lowering him like a parachute,
just before he hit the moon.

Phillip landed in the ocean,
and was sinking fast,
but tying up the leggings,
made his pants into a life raft.

Using a paper straw,
he puffed them full of air,
then lifted up a leg,
and sailed out of there.
(Leg acting like sail. Octopi, sharks and flying fish all watching him go.)

Phillip survived on oysters,
while to seagulls he did chat,
until the oyster farmers,
said; “That’s enough of that!”
(Caught in a fishing net.)

They undid one of his leggings,
sending Phillip whizzing along,
through big waves, off rocks,
past mermaids and their songs.
(Skimming off rocks, punching holes through waves…)

Finally Phillip made it back,
to where it all began,
tired, hurting, pants overflowing,
determined to make a stand!

“Give us our tree house back!”
he demanded of Bully Bob,
using his pant as a slingshot,
to fire squids and crabs and frogs!

Bully Bob was tough, though,
swallowing what he couldn’t dodge,
he stole Phillip’s stretchy pants,
and pushed him off a log.

“Don’t I now look the picture!”
he bragged as the sun came out,
with a tree house and stretchy pants,
Bully Bob really strut about!

“Do something!” the birds and squids,
all wailed to little Phil,
“Relax, I have a plan,” he smiled.
“Just sit back, watch and chill.”
(Sea birds of all sorts. Squids, crabs and fish in buckets, jam jars, watering cans etc…)

Sure enough, as the day got hotter,
Bully Bob began to squirm.
The sun shrunk the stretch pants,
small, and tight and firm.
(Bully’s face red, legs skinny with tightness of pants.)

“I can’t breath!” Bob squeaked,
his face turned beetroot red,
clambering, gasping,
as if not far from dead.

“I’ll save you,” Phillip insisted,
“But with some conditions…”
“Yes, yes, anything!” Bob rasped.
“Now call off the morticians!”
(Bully on ground under tree house, clutching/gasping. Mortician and crows waiting.)

Phillip made Bully Bob host,
a party at his tree house,
for the birds, squids and oyster farmers,
for being such a louse.
(Everyone having fun, except crab being chased by seagull, and Bully in apron, rushing out a big bucket of oysters for guests.)

Amazing stretchy pants back,
Phillip’s final trick;
sew them into a hot air balloon,
tell his grandma to come quick!
(Bully with helmet on, dressed like a butler, riding a penny farthing, with Nan in a sidecar, clutching her purse. Seagulls escorting them.)

To thank Nan for her gift,
Phillip took her on a trip,
in nothing but his underwear,
and bully for a sidekick.
(Pants shaping a Zephyr-like balloon, with Nana and Phil in basket, fish and squids in various jars, hanging off the side, taking photos, etc… Bully in front, on makeshift bike, with propeller, peddling.)

The End


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