The Bath
by
Matt Zurbo
(Boy and girl. Both filthy. One sitting in mud, other standing in it. Both staring at reader.)
The torture chamber.
(Image of a bath.)
No, no, argh! No!
(Boy and girl resisting as broom pushed them towards bath.)
Bitter defeat.
(Boy and girl, still filthy, staring out from in bath.)
Freedom!
(Bath had goat’s legs and is jumping out the window. Boy and girl in bath, clean hands, still filthy faces.)
A time machine!
(Boy and girl in bath with goat’s legs, in prehistoric setting.)
Woh!
(Huge dinosaur leg stomping down, sending bath, and boy and girl, through the air.)
Maybe not.
(Boy and girl huddling in bath as it runs way on two hind goat’s legs.)
How about a boat?
(Boy with frilly umbrella, girl rowing, bath on ocean, the odd flying fish passing, pelican overhead.)
Better yet, a pirate ship!?
(Boy and girl in bath, grimacing, boy throwing rubber ducky at small row boat full of nasty, leering pirates.)
Nope!
(Boy and girl paddling furiously as cannon balls and swords and gripping hands are behind them.)
A submarine?
(Boy and girl in bath underwater. Girl wearing goggles and snorkel, boy wearing old school diver’s helmet. Boy fighting off an octopus. Girl peering over edge at a mermaid.)
Maybe a griffin!
(Griffin leaping out of water, its back is the bath, with boy and girl in it. Octopus tentacles are following them from the water.)
Or simply a bird…
(Bath, with girl and boy in it, goat’s legs, and wide, eagle wings, is gliding towards sun and clouds.)
(Bath swooping past island monsters dancing around a fire.)
A place to hang out…
(Two monsters from island are sitting in bath edge, feet in water, while watching while girl and boy fight over a matchbox boat.)
Hold on. More warm water, please.
(Boy turning hot tap. Girl shivering. Bath is just a bath.)
A place for everyone to hang out!
(Girl, arms and head over edge, tongue out, as if squished. Bath full of two monsters, octopus playing ping-pong with pirate, ball bouncing off a seagull’s head, there is a periscope, Tarzan boy swinging from vine to land in bath, etc… Boy is being taught how to juggle soap by a clown. Goat’s legs under bath wobbling with the strain.)
Even sharks!
(Everybody scattering in fear, except boy and girl, who are still in bath, watching a big shark fin.)
And other stuff…
(Dragon’s head and neck coming out of water. Boy mildly surprised. Girl hugging it. Shark fin swimming away on ground out of bath.)
It’s the BEST for singing!
(Shouting/singing into soap, boy happy/in awe, using toothbrushes to pound a drumbeat.)
Wait! No, no, argh!
(Boy and girl in bath, arms in the air, shouting in panic, as if spinning down the plug hole, as adult hand lifts plug out.)
We don’t want to get out!
(Boy and girl hanging onto bath edge, we can just see their eyes and tops of their heads. Adult hand, thumb pointing; OUT.)
Hmph.
(Boy and girl wrapped in towels, in front of bath. We now realise they are totally clean except for their faces, which are still filthy.)
The End