Day 317: Wombat!

Matt Zurbo


If we had to send someone out into space…
(Scientists arguing. Rocket being built behind them. Wombat entering frame.)

or some-thing…
(Line up of creatures in spacesuits. Monkey, dog, cat, hamster, gorilla, donkey. Naked wombat walking past them all.)

I’d send a wombat.
(Wombat in space suit.)

I just couldn’t imagine much bothering a wombat.
(Wombat in suit, in rocket, g-force as it takes off. Wombat calm.)

They don’t seem to get bored, either.
(Wombat in spacesuit floating in space.)

If aliens came, a wombat wouldn’t get stressed.
(Wombat in space, watching aliens float from their ship. We can’t make them out through their space suits, but can tell they have four arms each.)

It would invite them to eat some grass.
(Wombat in dome, eating grass. Aliens still in suits behind it.)

Ask for a tummy scratch…
(Wombat on back, alien, still in suit, reaching down to scratch it’s belly.)

Show them how it does square poos.
(Aliens bent over, watching wombat do square poos, fascinated.)

Maybe play some checkers.
(Wombat playing checkers with an alien, still in suit.)

Nothing too spectacular.
(Wombat on back, propped against alien, both of them sleeping. Another alien behind them, sleeping in a hammock. We still can’t see them through their suits.)

Animals from other countries might freak out!
(Alien, still in suit, and wombat, walking. Behind them, monkey astronauts freaking out.)

Not wombat.
(Casually eating while blowing fart at monkey astronaut with gun. Monkey recoiling.)

Besides, what’s to say the aliens aren’t more like wombats than us?
(Alien, top half out of suit, is a 6ft alien wombat, with six legs.)

Crisis averted.
(Wombat, down low, and alien wombat, both with small smiles, giving each other a friendly head butt.)

Fame wouldn’t affect a wombat, either.
(Space ship to left of frame, with steps. Wombat casually walking past media.)

It would just go back to being a wombat.
(Wombat eating grass under brilliant Milky Way. Space helmet in grass in background.)

I dunno, the thought of a wombat up there is the best!
(Kid and wombat both looking up at sky.)

I just like wombats.
(Wombat walking away from reader, doing a fart.)



The End

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.