Bonus 9: Lou Logged On (In Hong Kong)

Lou Logged On (In Honk Kong)
by
Matt Zurbo

 

Lou logged on,
to a festival on line,
to listen to a writer
who liked to moan and whine.

International guests
from here, there, everywhere,
talked to those locked down,
bored beyond repair.

Lou lived in Hong Kong,
where he went to school.
He found it kind of dull,
this lanky Australian fool.

But there was a
PING!
Followed by a
GLUMP!
And Lou’s computer hit
a weird kind of bump!

Suddenly, he could see
other students as they stared,
into their monitors,
giving him a scare!

A dragon sat at its desk,
showing many sharp, sharp teeth,
sneering at the image of writer,
telling of his feats.

From another screen
a pretty angel yawned,
rubbing her watery eyes,
as the writer yammered on.

A monster from the deep,
watched from down a drain,
safe from the light of day,
that always caused it pain.

“Monsters, legends, fables?”
Lou watched the author’s back,
sure at any moment,
the speaker they’d attack!

“Hey! Look out!” Lou cried!
“Yo! Writer, Mister, Sir!”
“You’re being viewed by Hobbits,
Woblets and Bumbling Burrs!”

But the writer kept on talking,
tall tales, yarn after yarn,
based on his misspent youth,
living on a farm.

Lou, though, could not stop staring,
at wolves dressed in red hoods,
a cyclops, cute little mushroom elves
on their computers in the woods.

“HEY!” Lou roared louder,
“HEY, HEY, HO, HO, HOY!”
to his laptop screen,
but none could hear the boy.

He sat through the boring talk,
as the writer killed all fun,
waiting for question time,
when Lou could shout; “Please RUN!”

Gradually Lou noticed,
the dragon picking its nose,
the mermaid falling asleep,
a werewolf chewing its toes.

They were as bored as him,
with this writer and his tales,
only watching so in class,
none of them got fails.

“A mermaid school?” Lou thought.
“Sure, I guess, why not!”
“Voodoo Kids have to learn, too,
not just stir big pots!”

“As do spirits and ghosts.
How dull the afterlife,
if you only stare at walls,
and just talk to smelly mice?”

So the internet class,
when on and on and on,
as the writer talked so much,
unicorns burst into song!

If Lou could see their screens,
he guessed they could see his.
None of them flinched,
as if they were all just kids.

“Imagine that,” Lou thought.
“That I somehow fit in,
with you wildebeests,
and robots made of tin.”

Lou was kind of glad,
he had dobbed no beasts in!
That no one else in his online class,
had seen them all watching.

Just the amazing thought,
that Hong Kong held such beasts,
make the little boy’s heart,
skip to a happy beat!

Finally, the writer stopped.
A pirate skeleton moaned; “At last!”
The chat room was shut down,
and Lou went back to class.

 

The End